I talk…a lot…. I’m paid to articulate facts, opinions, and points of view. I’m paid to be able to articulate these things under the gun- shoot, sometimes, at the speed of light. At other times, I’m paid to think about an issue ad nauseam before I utter a single word.
I’ve found myself practicing the latter more these days in roles that I’m not paid for (friend, co-worker, daughter, mother, wife). These are all very complex relationships, and they don’t exist without conflict. Now, instead of jumping straight to oral arguments when conflicts occur, I tend to approach issues in three steps:
1) BREATHE- A nice cleansing breath has been known to save me from myself , particularly my sadistically sarcastic ways. Hey, I’m working on this and acknowledgment is the first step to recovery, right???
2) SHUT UP- No matter how much I’m tempted to brilliantly and eloquently state my case- I zip it….Surprisingly, I have yet to require a needle, thread, or super glue to keep these little busy lips of mine closed.
3) TALK ABOUT IT- Not to them…but to me. I talk to myself about how I feel, why I feel how I feel, what I can do unilaterally to stop feeling that way, and how to avoid that feeling in the future. It’s called self-responsibility folks…It’s very empowering to understand that YOU are the master of your emotions.